How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKY’S. PRETTY MUCH USELESS BUT MAKE YOU SMILE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS. Source: http://www.pingzic.com/funny-whatsapp-status-to-make-others-laugh/

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Rush Limbaugh

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I suck at poetry. Nice tits.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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