Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

Diarrhea

A boy walk in. What did you think I was gonna add "into a bar"? Also, boys under the age of 21 aren't allowed to drink.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

What happened to the white man who beat up the black man? He was arrested for assault and battery. What happened to the black man who beat up the white man? He was also arrested for assault and battery. Their races have no superiority to the law.

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

I'm gay.

Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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