What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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What is in the center of our galaxy? Some stars, space, and nebula.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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