Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had Leukemia

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Boys have swag, real men have class

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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