what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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The joke below me was written by someone who was mauled by a panther and raped by a tribe.

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Why does everyone love Randy Jackson? Well it's sure not because he's black.

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You were born.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the second and says, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" The second muffin replies, "Holy crap a talking muffin!"

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ert

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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