How did my grandparents survive the Holocaust? Well for starters, it helps that they weren't Jewish, they didn't live in Europe, and quite frankly, they probably would have supported Hitler because they were right wing pricks.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

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ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

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Dyslexics have more nuf!

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An Irishman and an Englishman are having a heated conversation about Rugby in a pub. Another Irish comes to the pub.. He is promptly given a bar stool and menu so that he can order.

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How did the black man get a car? He bought it.

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John Cena

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane from Mexico City to Los Angeles? A pilot you racist.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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