Why does the deer cross the road? It had just birthed two deer, one of which was hungry, and food was on the other side, the other had been hit by 4x4 Hemi V8 Supercharged F1-50.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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I literally died laughing

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What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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