- Anti Joke

What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

Why did the maths book commit suicide? It wanted to be history

A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed wink Parent: whut?

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

We have finally achieved the goal of six million followers, and created our own society, finally I can shout that this fucking world is insane! My world on the other hand, is what I have been dreaming about since the day I was born, maybe she had a reason to cut of my arm, maybe she was right to beat me half to death with it, maybe she was no more insane than I for seeing Satan when looking at me. But if a world of hope, peace, love, unity, without suffering, war, disease, guided by the hearts desire of my followers, where we can all be happy without "thanking oh great deity" for giving us what WE WITH HARD WORK AND SACRIFICE HAVE FINALLY ACHIEVED! IS THE WORK OF SATAN!... ...Then fuck, you are all welcome,,, Maybe I will one day want your souls, because I want freedom, and giving them in servitude to some God in exchange of eternal agony is freedom THEN I DO NOT FUCKING KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH THIS WORLD, BUT HELL IF IT IS SOMETHING REALLY FUCKING MESSED UP! I mean, sure, the world might have once experienced a life so terrible and hopeless that the thought of deities (invisible ghosts from space and their human children?) would come and set them free, as such humanity lost faith in themselves and so on... ...But does that excuse humanity for not believing in itself enough in order to create heaven on earth rather than destroy their only guaranteed life in hopes of life, ironically after death TODAY? Why he fucking HELL was I the ONLY ONE THAT COULD THINK OF THAT?! Then again, I achieved this not because I felt forced, if burdened with a painful feeling that I somehow knew there was a better way than religion or "my actions do not matter because I wont exist after death mentality". But because I was then, apparently the only one willing to listen to my hearts desire, believe in what religious people call "the lies of Satan", the notion that I would one day find power, freedom love, and the ability to share it with others upon this world... Either that, or my heart is something truly special... The only one worth listening to. So as I fear my own society, my own order being blown up by a nuke in an instant, proving somehow that I am Satan in disguise and that my dream was my lie... ...It was all worth it, and then it was all a lie, because humanity are those that do not allow it to happen, not Gods. I have nothing more to fear, I am complete. Yes hate me because I am full of pride for what I have done, because I am happy and finally at peace, call me a braggart, call me whatever the fuck you want and know that I have been called and known as far worse! But that is what my world is about, where nobody lives in shame "enduring" life on earth, settling in conformity, afraid of their neighbor, beating the shit out of their children because they wont say "Amen" before dinnertime until they do and again do the same to their children when they grow up. You are simply jealous... Its not arrogance if you can back it up, its not narcissism if every good thing you see in yourself, is what you have already achieved! One day I will seek to turn against your world, to burn it down and kill all that choose fear over love, this out of mercy... ...As if you have decided that life is a painful one that must be endured until death, and avoid all and everything that makes you happy... ...I will be more than happy to make your "arduous life of test on earth" A short one, so that you might hopefully meet your maker, after all, if that is not the way you feel, then you are betraying your God aka delusion, everybody wins. I made this, by my own effort at first, then followed by the few that are today many... And I am not human, but hell if I have any "Omnipotence"... ...And behold what I have created... And then ask yourself: WHY THE HELL CANT MY FUCKING OMNIPOTENT DELUSION DO THAT? This is for those that follow Neronism, and for those that from time to time, start to awaken from their brainwashing, as I no longer offer you the opportunity to create a world where you are treated with respect and love, where you will find wealth and peace... ...Because that world is already made, now I will allow you to beg me for a chance to see if you are worthy to take part in it, because humans... If hell if you made this dream hard for me. Bah, six million followers is enough for now, you others go kill one another in hopes of reaching of what my vision has created on earth. Farewell horsehead network, where I grew the thick skin required in order to withstand being laughed at, this with and on purpose, you have served your purpose. And should you be one of mine reading, then thank you for making it happen, and fuck, you are very damn welcome as well. I also expressed my anger, my doubts, my fears and rage here, now that is finally over, as I no longer carry any of those emotions, and do not rule, but guide out of my people`s respect for me rather than fear, in a world where such emotions are not neccesary. Nero. (Yes religious assholes, you might call me Satan, I really hope you will find heaven after life, because if hell if you are welcome to our heaven on earth). Ps: I know I have said I will leave for good before, and then some jackass kept posting "Moralman is gone/dead" but this time I mean it, id be ashamed to return, besides I have my own empire to take care of, I did not want to become the emperor, but why deny the desire of all of my followers? Somehow I have reason to believe I am capable.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

Y' can't spell rape without ape.

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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