why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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Hey Shea

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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This is a haiku. Not a very good haiku, But still a haiku.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

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Bob Saget

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My wife made me a sandwich

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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