What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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My heart is in my hands. Call an ambulance.

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What does samios search on google? Shemale gey big t.it lactating big c.ock An.al tearing Ana.l dilation school girl rape compilation

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Why do I exist? Because my mom gave birth to me.

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a cop wrote most of these anti-jokes O.o

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised that they are in the presence of a celebrity.

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting shot in the knee several times and bleeding to a slow and painful death.

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A Black guy and a Mexican guy walk into the bar. The bar tender offers to buy them a round of drinks because he can tell they had a hard day at the office.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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