what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call double A's? Batteries

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

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Boy: Your father must be an alien, because there’s nothing else like you on earth! Girl: *whispering* please don't tell anyone we are trying not to be noticed...

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What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

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What colour is chocolate? Brown.

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Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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once upon a time, it snowed

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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Why did the man stop playing his computer game? The SWAT busted down his door and quickly pinned him down and arrested him for the murder of 7 families, he was charged for life in prison.

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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hi, my name is zack, i have a boner from the girl to my right(;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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