How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

a black man is chasing a white man,, "sir you dropped your wallet'!!

What do you call a paralyzed man on a fishing boat? Robert

why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

time to spruce up!

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

How do you make a baby understand what you want? You color yourself purple, wear a yellow shirt, and do cart wheels while singing "The wheels on the bus go 'round and 'round!"

whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

What happened to your hamster? It died.

i named my son Frodo because he was little

Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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