Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

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Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

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A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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MAKE

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

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Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

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Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

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3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

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What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

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A blond went to a barber to get her hair cut. She had her ear phones in and tolled the barber not to take her ear phones out at all. So the barber was swiching her ear phones to cut her hair then she fell asleep so the barber took both of her ear phones off for a minute and then she died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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