What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

thumb_up thumb_down -22

*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

thumb_up thumb_down -22

dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

thumb_up thumb_down -22

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does a black man love more than anything? His family you racist c u n t.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the jew crying? He just found out his newborn baby had twenty minutes to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops