Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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Fathers Day at Tyrone's house.

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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Y the girl tuch her butt she tried To get dookie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

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So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

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what did sushi A say to sushi B? Nothing, because sushi is composed of aboitic fish, rice and other nutritious components and cannot speak

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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Why was the blonde confused? Because she had 10 second memory loss.

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops