What did the badger say to the mushroom? BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER MUSHROOM MUSHROOM! BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER ARGH SNAKE! IT'S A SNAKE...

What's the difference between an orange? A duck.

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

tomatoe tomato my toe is named tom

Who's on first? Garvey.

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

A: why did the kid run out of lead B: because his dad broke into his house raped his wife and stoll everything he owned

roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

Why did the boy fall down the stairs? Because he tripped.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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