Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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why did the duck cross the road? because his d**k was stuck in the chickens a**....

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Q: Why is Rosie odonell fat? A: Because you are sexual attracted to small children.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't, she's dead.

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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There's a elf ,a peice of paper, and a pencil. What happens next? The elf writes on the paper.

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Why couldn't the black man support his family? He was the youngest child of 3 and already had a caring and supporting mother and father.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Q: How do you make a baby cry? A: Throw a brick at it.

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Peas

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What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

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What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the girl drown? She had no arms or legs and couldn't swim.

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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What is 6 1/2 inches when erected? My penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops