roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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What do you call the branch of Science that separates the organism's race? RACISM

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

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Why was the kid mad? Because he died.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Why did the little boy fall down? Be he had the downs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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