How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Too many because they are babies and they don't have the motor skills to properly use a paintbrush.

Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

Stones cannot fly. Humans cannot fly either. Therefore.. I wish I didn't get AIDS...

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

What do you call a man with no legs, and one arm? Whatever his name happens to be.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

Your mom.

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

what's worse than being attacked by a giant ant? being attacked by two giant ants

Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

what did the paraplegic man get for Christmas? a unicycle

Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

i keep getting thumbs down...

Why couldn't the convicted felonist get back to America? He was in Antarctica and accidentally licked a flagpole.

Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...