What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

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What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

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Patient: "So what seems to be the problem doc? Doctor: "I'm afraid you have AIDS. I'm sorry."

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

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FUS RO DAH!!!

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Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Why did the boy get stuck on the toilet? He was Elvis.

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What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

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So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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