Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 7 is a registered sex offender

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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Whats black,White and Asian? everything we are all equal

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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What's the difference between your mother and a prostitute? Nothing.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

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The Female Orgasm

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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Why some people don't get the flu twice? Because they died!

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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