Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

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what do you call a man who likes other men? A fag

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Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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What's the same between a bike and a duck? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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A dyslexic blind man

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Two olives are sitting on a table. One loses his balance and rolls off. The other calls down to it, "Oh my gosh, are you okay?" And the olive yells up, "No. I just rolled off a friggin table."

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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how do you know if your pleasuring a woman? who cares

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

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Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish.

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Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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