Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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Two homosexuals walk into a bedroom, and begin to have sex.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

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CISSY: TIMMY! COME AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK THIS INSTANT TIM: ....................../´¯/) ....................,/¯../ .................../..../ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( ..............\.............\... *CISSY SMACKS TIMMY AND SENDS HIM TO HIS ROOM WITHOUT DINNER.

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Me "knock knock" Tramp "who's there" Me "nobody you havent got a door"

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What's up with airplane food? Well I am a big fan of peanuts, so nothing

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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Derp

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

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where is the world?

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What super hero did they choose to be on the Blue Jays' team? Batman!

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What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

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A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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sharks

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops