Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

What does a fish say when it swims into a wall? Damn

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

Whats worse than the holocaust A.MRS FRANK B.HITLER ANSWER MRS FRANK

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 6's family

Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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