Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

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A Polar Bear walks into a bar and says to the barman: "Barman! Give me a whiskey and ............................................................coke." The barman says: "Why the big pause?" to which the Polar bear replies: "Well uhm my father had big paws"

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Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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what do fish smoke? sea weed

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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I like my women like I like my coffee, a brewed beverage prepared from the roasted seeds of an evergreen shrub of the genus Coffea.

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

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A black man, a mexican, and a christain are on an island. There are also many other people on the island, since all of North America and South America is one giant land mass.

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

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What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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why did michael jackson write black or white he didnt want black people to copy him

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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