Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs? A: Disabled.

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Why was Junior sad? His parents were killed in a car crash.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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Adam Claypool walks into a bar. He immediately sucks the bartender's dick because he is the biggest queer anyone has ever seen

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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What did the virgin say to the car salesmen? Hello, I'm really interested in buying a car today.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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I hate it when I go running and my diick always gets road rash from being dragged So I cut it off

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how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

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Q: A young friend you met on the internet invites you over to his house. When you arrive, Chris Hansen enters the room. What does he say? A: Welcome to our home

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Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

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How do you become a dragon ball super saiyan? You sit there and scream like you are giving birth for three minuets

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What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

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Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

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Its true, he didnt write that!!

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your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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