Marrage s like a card game. You start off with 2 hearts and 1 diamond. You end up wishing for a club and a spade!

Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

willie revilame

John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

what do you do when you see a injured black man screaming in pain rolling on the ground assist him or call 911 depending how severe the injury is

Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

A White man, a Black man, and an Asian man go to Heaven. They were in a plane crash.

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

How do you make a little boy cry? You rape his dog

What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

NO! Nero created the MULTIVERSE During the sixth day... And on the seventh... He did not get any sleep or rest either...¨ SO THE GREAT EXPLOSION OF ENDORPHIN'S WAS CREATED AND IT WAS GOOD! Moral:"Seriously, get lost, only the trio of the Gods Me,Myself, and I, are worthy of this tribulation!

A baby seal walks into a club.

-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

Steve Jobs Died today. So did 56 million other people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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