Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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What do you call a bitchy unreliable friend? You don't call that bitch at all.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to severely injure a human.

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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whats worse than having no life? having no life and reading internet jokes all day!

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Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

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Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit in the back of the bus? Rebecca Black decided to sit in the front.

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

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why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

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Knock Knock Who's there? It is actually not a good idea to say "who's there" to the random person outside. The man could be a robber or a murderer, and will realize a person is inside. He could bomb the door down and do anything to kill you. You should look through the window first, or through the little peep hole. If the person outside is an acquaintance, then you can respond. However it is best to not reply and leave the stranger alone. Safety is key to living a happy joyful life.

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What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops