whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

Whats the square root of pie? Pies are round.

Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

a doctor came into the room after receiving a woman's test results for lung cancer. the woman says, "is it negative or positive doctor?" the doctor looks at the woman and says, "it's negative, congratulations."

Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

everybody loves raymond

Womens' sports

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

Why did the kid get hit by the bus? He was in the road.

What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

The NBA and womens sports

What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

Xzibit

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...