knock knock? who's there? a guy..... so the man open's the door and the guy clutching a knife stabs repeatedly at his chest killing him and drags his body down into his cellar locking him away from the open world. by Mad James

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What's green, grows in my basement, and if fun to smoke? Mold. I lied about it being fun to smoke.

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Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

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When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

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Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

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Knock Knock Who's There 42

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why was 6 jealous of 7? 7 had a huge dick.

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haha

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a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

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What's worse than no wifi Nothing.

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you? Give her a time-out. Throwing sharp objects is not okay.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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How do you circumsize a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw.

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What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

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You will not press the like button.

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What did Iran say to Israel? ALLLLAHH

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Illumati Confirmed

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Your pathetic humanity. Deux. Dios Gud God etc. Moral: You cannot even translate the name of his very being correctly, and you expect the bible to be translated right... Laught now, because I shall silence you soon enough...

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. My Grandma has Alzheimers and always repeats what she says. (Submitted by Aidan)

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On a scale of 1 to Lord Voldemort, how awkward would you say your hugs are?

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What happened when man put a dog in the blender? He got arrested for Animal abuse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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