Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock Who's there Boo Boo who DONT BE SUCH A PUS*Y

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

thumb_up thumb_down -19

xavier stop

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I hate it when you can't tell whether a person is male or female.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Wait what? What if you use the what what? Sorry I am still like super hypnotic trippy, dont worry though, I dont want it to end.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When life throws you lemons, duck cuz they freakin' hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

thumb_up thumb_down -21

can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? The same amount as white people, stop being racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops