Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

CORRECTION TO THE COMMENT BELOW! Its a WIN/WIN/WIN/WINWINWINWINWINWIN (WIN For at least 30 more minutes)/CUUUUM!/"SORE ASS WHINING CHILD Gonna grow into a slut SITUATION!" friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man The Anti-Christ: Do not thumb me down unless you want to feel the big burning hot spear of darkness, and you do not... You better don`t be or become a sore ass kid you allshole if you know what I am saying... Yeah! Thats right! You better fear me! Because the angrier you look... The more offended you become... The better you are starting to look...

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You're so stupid, you had to take part in special classes in school, and despite this specific attention to your educational development, you've made no major progress.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Hitler get for Christmas? Some shoelaces for his shoes so he could tie his little knotsies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Guy A turns to Guy B and says, 'Hey, can I use your cellphone to call my mom?" Guy B nods and says, "Yeah, sure, just press redial." Guy B had been planning an surprise party for Guy A and had called Guy A's mother for ideas.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

eden stop

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +13

hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops