A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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your mother is so fat that her doctor advised her to stick to a strict diet and exercise routine to help her lose weight

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What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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What's bue and sticky? -A blue stick.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? because he is dead -Eden Hogg

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During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

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Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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An american took a vacation to Mexico.... the American police were contacted 3 days later... the American was supposedly killed during a drug trade...

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HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahaahhahahaahhahahahahahahhaahhahaahhahahahaahhahaahaha - Louis

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

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I SAID I WANT A GLASS OF JUICE. NOT I WANT TO GAS THE JEWS!-hitler

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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