what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

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why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

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Alex Gedrose.

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Chikin nuggets are cooler than your mom!!!!!!!

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What happened to Dave when he walked across the road? He got hit by a car and died... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Dave...

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You've been in robotics too long if you start talking to your tools. You've been in there way too long if they start talking back!

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One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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What is black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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A man walks up to another man and asks what time it is. He then replies " It's 2:00" The man then pulls out a sandwich and eats it

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Q. What did the man say when he beat his video game? A. "I beat my video game." Q. What did the man say after his favorite sports team missed the playoffs? A. "My favorite sports team missed the playoffs." Q. What did the man say when a murderer was in his house? A. Nothing. He was dead.

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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