How do you stop a car? Put on the Brake

I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

What did OJ Simpson say to the blonde? "Don't worry, I'm not going to murder you"

Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

are you from Tennessee, cause i wanna rip out your throat you piece of dirt

What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

Q: Why are asians good at math? A: Because they study with their tutor every tuesday

How do you stop clowns from throwing cinderblocks at your car? Hire a hitman.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he thought he saw a dangerous predator in the area and crossed the road in an attempt to flee the dangerous situation.

Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because lately the posts on "anti-joke.com" have not been anti-jokes. Not even a little.

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

What's funnier than 24? My life.

whats cold and in a box...have a guess

What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your mother getting raped by your sister.

Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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