What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

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Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a brick at him!

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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Why are Ethiopians so fast? Because antelope are also very fast.

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yo' Mamma's so fat when she stepped on the scale, she said "hey, that's my phone number"!

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

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Whats sadder than a lost baby deer? Im too lazy too think of the rest of the joke.

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why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

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Q: What did the chinese guy say to his friend? A: ??

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Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

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My computer will die soon, and my life is a lie. Refrigerator.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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Have you noticed when you see geese flying and they're in a V pattern, often one side will be longer than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops