So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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A white man and a black woman walk into a bar, they both fell in love and lived happily together until their 25 year old son had gotten in too a car crash Luckily their son lived

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A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

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why didn't the chicken cross the road ? because half way acroos he got hit by a car and the animal heath care had to take him away and put him down

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Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

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Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

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What did one dinosaure say to the other? Nothin, they are all dead. XD

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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<3 ... it looks more like scissors than a heart...

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troll----> hahaha---->

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

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Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Giovanna Plowman.

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops