a horse walks into a blender ow

Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

What is the last digit of Pi? Pi is an infinite decimal sequence, and therefore has no last number, but if it did, it would presumably be somewhere from 0-9.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

wow such mark very mark many mark so mark

My penis is big... not.

there once was a man from Afghanistan. Who wanted to bang his brother-istan. they licked and sucked. and kissed then f**ked, he got aids. and never did that-again!

what is green, blue with spots all over? A frog with chicken pox

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

What do you call a quadriplegic person in the water? One should refer to them by their name, but seeing as a quadriplegic person would be incapable of swimming if you do see a quadriplegic person in a body of water you should seek help or call emergency services.

Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

How to confuse a dumbass: see previous post.

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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