Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

Why did the Asian man go to bed? Because he was tired

You know what's catchy? A cold

Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is an active member of a taliban.

Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

Cheese stick

what is long hard and full of seamen......... A sumbirine..........................(what were you thinking)

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

Their is a stripper, a prostitute, and a pole dancer on a plane that is about to crash. They all die.

Roses are red Violets are blue If i gave a rats ass I'd worry about you

how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

look under under where under under where. under the couch

where did Lucy go when the bomb dropped? everywhere.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

roses are red and have big balls woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

meh

What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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