If a quiz is a quizzical what is a test? A testicle

what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

What is green and had wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.....

Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

You see how lame this is?

Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

Why was Shane cool... Because he was a cool bean.

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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