Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

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you

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So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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An Irish, an English, a Chinese and a French are together in a boat. And it shows the diversity of our society.

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What Did Charles Manson Do For a Klondike Bar? He Bought One

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a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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hit the thumbs down button

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I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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What the difference between Adolf Hitler and Michael Phelps? Micheal Phelps can finish a race.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

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nickel back

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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Q: why'd the monkey fall out of the tree A: because it was dead

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What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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What is the similarity between fake rings and your mother? They change colors in the shower

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops