A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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Why did Moses part the sea Because it was divisible by 2

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What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

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Q: whats worse than ten babies in one trash can A: one baby in ten trash cans

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what did the man say to his dog? sex. -teagan doherty

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Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

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Why did Dom stop smoking? Because he died

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The seven dwarves sat around the house feeling Grumpy, so Grumpy left.

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"who you calling pinhead" tell me you know what thats off

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whats the difference between justin beiber and a gay guy? both guys and girls like gay guys

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

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Why did the young man not want to go to school? Because he had a large tumor on the left side of his face.

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how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

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What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

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And more;

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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"You're not very subtle, are you?" asked Nyacinth of the Prince. "Coo-fif," replied the Prince, a sly smile on his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops