your mom is so fat, shes not skinny

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Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Q: What's brown and smells like poo? A: poo

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The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Why is Justin Biber so white? there's nothing in the closet.

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What's the funniest thing about the holocaust? Nothing it wasn't a joke

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

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A middle aged man goes to a psychic. She tells him that he has prostate cancer, and his wife has been cheating on him for the past 3 years.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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