Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken would greatly appreciate it if you stayed out of its personal life.

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

Guy #1: Knock knock Guy #2: Whos there? Guy #1: Interrupting murderer Guy #2: Interrupting murd.... Guy #1: STAB!!!

Lady wanna go out sometime? Im not lesbian girl! Im not a girl... OUCHIE!

What's the difference between a mexican and a park bench? One is a minority whose ancestors originally lived in the central american country of Mexico, the other is a useful convenience that provides a place to rest one's legs in a public place.

Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

wanna no wats not funny........ aids

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We don't know if he even did, how would we know why? There were no cameras at the intersection he crossed at. Therefor the question is unanswerable. Unless the chicken admits to it........ ........ Chickens can't talk.

All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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