What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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Q: Why don't black people like My Chemical Romance? A: Actually, some of them do.

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roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

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I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

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Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

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Why did the little boy enter the white van, then leave scarred for life? He was going on a family trip within the said white van, but along the way they got in a horrible accident which involved a bus, a tractor, and finally a steamroller. The boy quickly escaped at the last second only to watch his family scream as the steamroller slowly crushed the van where they were trapped inside. He then broke down into tears and depression and finished it all by jumping off a bridge. It was a truly tragic incident.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

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Roses are red. Violets are red. I have a gun. What did i do?

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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Why did the gay man die? He had AIDS

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What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

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knock knock come back later i'm taking a shower!!!

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Knock Knock? Who's there? (No answer)

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -John. -Hey John, come on in.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and an Indian man are all in the taxi when they were all killed in a car crash. Who was driving the car? The taxi driver.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Nothing.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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Why did Tiger look in the toilet? It doesn't matter, he didn't find anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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