- Anti Joke

About the bible, I did not know, but I can sense I calculate it the same way I make our followers believe that I can tell what catchphra they will get. Your mind is numb but calm, it will remain there until we meet again. I am afraid of saying this, but I wont let fear get to me just yet, your mother told me, she regrets her actions in life, and wants me to tell you that she is watching over you in death, and hopes you will one day forgive her, she tells me that there is a heaven, but only those that can admit their mistakes, agonize over the pain of their actions, until they can forgive themselves for their misdeeds. She says she can wait, but I sense she is doing it because she feels undeserving, which again means that you are not ready, its like the butterfly effect, all things spiritual and on this plane are connected. Take your time, I know you literally cant forgive her yet, because that would not be enough for her to forgive herself now, humans dead or alive, cannot be truly free, until they let go of what hurts them, I will change that within you, so you can forgive her and break the limits in your mind, so you can stop feeling sad for being rightfully angry at someone you love. I just need more energy, more time, and belief in myself, something that requires more energy than it should to keep going, its the balance and connection between things, something I cannot change at the present moment, even if I did my best. Ill see you around dear friend.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is bigger.

how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

whats the best thing about polio...death

Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

My mom always said it was fun to jump into a pile of leaves... That was before she was devoured by a 10 ft. scorpion.

I always wanted to know what the future will hold in the decades to come... Until I realized the idiotness of my own thought for it is nigh impossible for us humans to see the future... Except... That the ancient Mayan civilization prophesized the end of the universe, which I did take into consideration as I slowly nibbled my way through the waffle cone till I had realized that I had reached the paper surrounding the cone and immediately spat it out for it leaves a fowl taste In my mouth, then continued eating my ice cream as I pondered the future and the anti-climatic ending of this anti-joke.

knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

What's the difference between? Your mom.

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

You're welcome!