What did the polar bear say when he walked into a sauna? Absolutely nothing because he was a polar bear. I mean seriously, did I even have to ask? Everyone should know that a polar bear is an animal and he wouldn't say anything. If he did it would most likely be a growl or a roar. If you believed that he would have said something you obviously didn't pass the first grade. I finish with the fact that a polar bear would not survive in a sauna because they are accustomed to cold clima I guess this was just a waste of time.

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more likely you are to realize that beans aren't actually fruit. They're legumes.

Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

That awkward moment when... Your mom is a guy.

How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

Rachel not blowing Robert.

There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

Why did Sally cross the road? Because she fell off a tree. Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally wanted to cross the road.

whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

What does the scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!

What's worse than getting Ebola? Nothing

What did Jimmy say when the bully poured milk on his head? Nothing, instead he took out a shank and proceeded to stab him 30 times and let him bleed to death for being a douche.

Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

What's clear and wet? water

what do the Holocaust and Jeff Dunham have in common? they're both hilarious

Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

NO! Nero created the MULTIVERSE During the sixth day... And on the seventh... He did not get any sleep or rest either...¨ SO THE GREAT EXPLOSION OF ENDORPHIN'S WAS CREATED AND IT WAS GOOD! Moral:"Seriously, get lost, only the trio of the Gods Me,Myself, and I, are worthy of this tribulation!

There was a black man and a mexican woman at a bar. The women says, "Why are all racial jokes about men?" The black man replies, "Because it is believed by some that males are superior to women." The woman went to go order a book from amazon.

Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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