Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

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What's green and blue that is shaped like the earth? The earth

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Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

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your mom is like a lowling ball, she likes to be fingered then thrown back into the gutter

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Q: What did Yoda do at the end of star wars when he lost his light saber? A: He asked the prop guy if he had any more and he happened to have another and they went on with making the great film many still love today.

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Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

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Your mama's so fat.

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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What do you get when you rub 2 redheads together? Fire.

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Every time im sad, I think of a T-Rex trying to put on a hat.

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what time is it? 3:16

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Pineapple.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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What did one pile of dirt say to the other pile of dirt?? You're dirty

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why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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