Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a dog

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What do you call a gay couple of kangaroos adopted baby A Joey

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

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how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Whats worse than getting stabbed in nuts? A retarded baby that survived the abortion

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What's worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? 1 dead baby in 12 trash cans.

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

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Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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What's green has eight legs, and would kill you of it fell on you from the top of a tree? A Billiard table

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What do you say when you kill a pregnant lady? Double kill

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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Chickens want to live in a world where they arent judged for cossing a road ......... K?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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