A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

What's the difference between an apple and an orange? 87

A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

19th amendment

How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

Whats worse than a gay pride parade? Genocide.

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Man goes fishing.... Catches Fish.

THE GAME

I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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